so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
