My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
