I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
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