I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize