Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
thus making me awesome and them whores
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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