No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
it wasn't lemon gatorade
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize