she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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