No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
