I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
