ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
