just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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