He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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