After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
