She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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