I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize