He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Dear god my vagina.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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