It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize