never play flip cup with pint glasses
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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