i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Randomize
