i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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