I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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