i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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