He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
