Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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