Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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