ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
