Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize
