So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
