if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize