Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
