I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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