I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
