Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I have demons in me.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
