Plan B is the new Plan A
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
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