Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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