it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize