Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Can vaginas get frostbite?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Randomize
