Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
