Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i would punch a child for taco bell
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize