you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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