When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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