Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
