They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize