My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
