The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
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