I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
All I want is dick and wine.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
