quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
