I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
