someone owes me an orgasm
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
