I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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