I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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