Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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