I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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